


faded nights

by strawberryfinn



Series: best friends turned lovers [3]
Category: One Direction (Band), X Factor RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Gen, M/M, Male Friendship, Multi, Other, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-07
Updated: 2012-10-07
Packaged: 2017-11-15 19:20:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/530791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/strawberryfinn/pseuds/strawberryfinn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry and Niall are best friends who just happen to fall in love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	faded nights

 

It’s raining.

I’m at Niall’s house and it starts raining. I can hear the pitter-patter on the roof and the sound of the thunder in the distance. I bet there’s going to be lightning soon; it’s going to rain hard, I bet.

We’re sitting on his couch; the old beat-up but strangely comfortable one, just sitting. I don’t know; with Niall I never talk. Niall rarely talks to anybody; he just sits and looks out wistfully with his pale blue eyes. Somewhere.

I’ve never asked Niall where he goes. If he trips out, gets lost in his mind, it’s good with me. If I had Ni’s life, I’d do the same thing, you know. Just forget my life and leave the world behind.

I can hear his parents fighting in the other room. I wonder about him and how he survives at home. Sure, my life’s not great either, but at least it’s just my dad and me, just living on what we have. Niall’s parents fight all the time, even if he has a friend over, even on holidays like Christmas which I only know because he comes to my house then. Just climbs in over the fence of our backyard and manages to get himself in somehow, his face blank and his eyes emotionless. He’ll just say, “I’m staying here,” and that’s that. I don’t know.

But I remember last Christmas when he got into our house, his breath shaky and his eyes red. My dad didn’t even look twice as I let Niall in. My dad just put down another placemat at the table and Niall stayed with us that Christmas, eating our Christmas dinner of stale cocoa puffs.

The fighting is getting louder and I hear something break. Niall doesn’t even flinch. This is old news for him.

I reach over and squeeze his hand. I don’t say anything. Ni, he always knows what you’re thinking even if you don’t say anything. That’s what’s good about him; some times you just don’t want to talk at all and he understands everything you want to say.

Niall knows what I’m saying.

He grabs his keys and we start tip-toeing out of his house. Like it would matter. His parents wouldn’t even hear us, they’re so loud. I can hear them screaming at each other and I bet even if they knew I was in their house, they’d still be fighting.

A lot of times I’m glad I never knew my mum. If I had one, I wouldn’t want her to be like that. I bet half the time Niall wishes he didn’t have parents, you know? I wouldn’t want parents if I had his; I think I’d just be okay with having my friends alone. I guess it’s good my mum and my dad split when I was born, so I don’t know anything about her, or my sister who went with her.

We get to the front door and Niall and I grab our bikes which are lying right outside. We always leave them there at his house.

We stand in the doorway for awhile, just looking at the street. It’s really wet outside, the floor is already slick and puddles are forming, but anything is better than in his house that smells like old laundry and dirty dishes because frankly, Niall is too tired of his parents to give a damn.

I nod at Niall and clamber onto my bike. There’s nothing like the feeling of it, as you just move along the wet pavement, the smell of rain in your nose as you skid and slip along the blacktop. My curly hair is already sticking fast to my face but I don’t care. _This_ is what I live for.

Niall is ahead of me, his whitish-blonde hair matting to his pale, lightly freckled face. I can see the darkness of his brown roots coming through. His eyes are concentrating on the floor ahead of him.

We just bike. Silently, ignoring the cars that go by with the drivers that gape at us. We’re used to it.

We head down the Niall’s street and out of his neighborhood. We go past the liquor store that nobody goes to anymore, past the park that I used to hide in the tunnels of when I was four, and past two intersections. The pavement is gone and we’re moving in wet dirt, but I don’t care.

I am soaked to the bone in about five minutes flat. I look at Niall whose white t-shirt clings to him, his wet hair plastered to his face, but his eyes alive. And _happy._

We get there. I see the barbed wire fence and the familiar stretch of brown dust—now mud—with the small patches of grass. The property that has had the “For Sale” sign for so long, but we know nobody’s going to buy it.

Niall and I just silently get there and lean our bikes against the fence, watching as they land with a short _thud_ against the wire mesh. We shove our faded sneakers through the crisscrosses in the wires and climb over. My hand gets cut but I don’t mind, just stick it into my mouth and taste the blood as I walk towards the center of the vacant lot, Niall behind me.

Niall flops down in the middle of the field, looking up at the clouds which are clumping together in dark grey bundles. His eyes are closed as the rain drips down into his mouth, his firework of blonde hair plastered to his white face like he’s trying to drown herself. His t-shirt is completely staiend through and I can see the ridges of his chest and his ribs through the thin fabric. I flop down next to him, slipping my thin arm under his neck, and he chokes in hard, a haggard breath, as he nestles his head on my shoulder. I feel the slick mud slipping up through the grass and brushing against my shoulderblades.

I don’t know exactly when Niall went from being my best friend to more than my friend, but I don’t mind it. It’s a constant ache in my chest, heavy behind my sternum, but I’ve learned to live with it. I’ve learned to live with the nights where we spoon, the way the edges of his cheekbones feel under my fingerpads. I’ve learned to understand the kisses—the quick kisses in between the corridors at school, the _be careful let’s not get caught_ kisses while he’s in my room, the _can we do this forever_ kisses, slow and languid when we’re by ourselves, nestled in my car. I brush my chapped lips over his sleek, slippery cheek in a barely there kiss, and Niall opens one of his eyes, glances at me, and smiles. He moves closer to me, and slips his hand, slick with dirt and grime and grass, into mine.

I can feel his heartbeat under my fingers, and I let myself know that he’s there, he’s there, he’s _there._

We lie down and watch the rain fall. Just silently, as the rain cleanses our skin, and soaks to the very bottom of our souls.

I blink water out of my eyes and look over at Niall. His eyes are now closed again, and his eyelashes are dotted with precipitation, in small, delicate little cities. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything more breathtaking. I wonder what he’s thinking; what he’s wishing for, but I don’t know. Maybe we’ll talk later.

I imagine myself melting. I can hear the thunder, louder and louder now and I want the lightning to come. I want the lightning to come down and strike me and spread over my body; making me feel one hundred percent alive for once in my existence. Just one time, that’s all I want.

The lightning doesn’t come. It doesn’t come the whole hour and however many minutes we lay there in the rain until we’re fully soaked and our clothes are twice as heavy as they were when we came. The lightning doesn’t come to make me feel alive.

So I get up, push my hair off of my skin and out of my eyes, and try to think of a better plan.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I will always see Harry and Niall as best friends who become something more. Hope you guys liked this x


End file.
